2012. The Year in Reflection

NYE 2011 - 130+kgs

I've just been reading the amazing Sarah McGee's blog, and she has written a few things that she's learnt in the last year.  Mind you, she has lost 63kgs!!!  Ah-mazing!!!!  Such a lovely girl in person as well.  Of course, it's all good and well to lose weight & inspire other people, but if you're an arsehole, well, that's another story!  Ms McGee on the other hand, is just gorgeous inside & out, through & through!!!

Anyway, her blog post got me thinking of my year in reflection, now that 2012 is coming to a close.  And you know something?  I really can't remember much of the first half of the year before I started the 12wbt.  Nothing notable happened at all - birthdays, a couple of holidays, but it was all in a blur of eating too much, being a sloth in front of the TV, and drinking wine almost every night.  And then June 4th rolled around, and just like that, my life changed.

Now, in retrospect, this round and the last have been nothing compared to that very first round, where I gave it my all.  Life does happen, and things do come up.  But I am proud of myself with how I just keep going each and every round.  I have a bad day, a bad week, a bad round, but I will not give up.  This is for the rest of my life.

Following in Sarah's footsteps on her blog, here are a couple of things I've learnt about myself and about life in the last 7 months since that magic day on June 4th...

Some of the local 12wbt crew on our Boxing Day boxing session

1. I love exercise!  In the beginning, or even when I've had a bit of a break from it, it could be a struggle to get into the routine of it, but I have found that I love exercising, and I really miss it when I can't do it.  Walking, riding, boxing, circuit training, Mish's DVDs.  I love it all.  And I can't wait to get into weight training as we set up our home gym over the next few months.
2. Healthy food isn't boring.  The new ingredients and flavours we've been cooking have been fantastic!!!  I'm never going back to the old cooking I used to do!  Even the kids love it.
3. Cooking isn't a chore.  God, I hated cooking.  Especially at dinner time.  I would rather stick a fork in my eyeball than cook dinner for the family!   Back in June I remember standing in the kitchen crying because it seemed I spent so much time there preparing our 12wbt meals.  But now I am a bit more prepared, I know what I'm doing and I actually like it (it's not love yet, but that may happen!)
4. Living healthy makes me happy.  The whole family has benefited from the 12wbt.  I can see how unhappy both Greg and I were, although we didn't even know it.  
5. This is my own journey, and I don't compare myself to anyone else.  Whether it be others on the 12wbt, or Greg, I don't make comparisons anymore!  I remember in the first round when Greg's weightloss really took off, and I was just so shitty that I wasn't losing weight as fast as him.  Then a lightbulb went off, and I realised this was MY journey.  Although we're on the same path together, our journeys are totally different and we're at a different pace to each other.  But we'll both reach the final destination eventually.  And if Greg gets there first, I have no doubt he'll be waiting for me with open arms.
6. I've made some amazing friends on the 12wbt.  I must admit, I am a little shy when it comes to meeting new people, and some can take me the wrong way due to my sarcasm, or mistake my awkward shyness for rudeness.  Lucky Greg is anything but shy!!!!!  But I have met some beautiful people along the way.  Many on the 12wbt forums & Facebook groups, who I am fortunate enough to have met at the last two finales I've been to.
7. Health is SO IMPORTANT!  After being struck down with Ross River Virus, this has been highlighted to me over & over in the last couple of months.  I've loved been in tune with my body on the 12wbt, but having no control over it with the RRV has really frightened me & made me aware how important it is to have a healthy & fit body.
8. Cancer is a fucker!  And I will raise $10,000 over the next 10 months for my Ride to Conquer Cancer benefiting Peter Mac & shave my head bald!
9. Michelle Bridges ROCKS!!!!

So, 2013 is nearly here.  I will get to goal weight this year, but more importantly, I am going to be fit, strong, happy and the healthiest I have ever been.  And I cannot bloody wait!!!!

Goodbye Silly Season!!!

My bestie Jen & I at our Kris Kringle dinner

Well, my notable absence on my blog is well & truly an indication of how I've been going on the 12wbt.  One word to describe it?  SHIT!!!!

WOW what a huge couple of weeks!!!!  Dinners and catchup with friends, ballet concerts & rehearsals, kindergarden & school concerts, kinder picnics, Paige's birthday, the list goes on!!!!  All whilst battling Ross River Virus, and not having a car whilst it was in getting fixed after the smash.   Unfortunately the silly season seems to have gotten the better of me, and my weeks have been filled with no exercise & copious amounts of booze & bad food choices.   Sure, I haven't been well with the RRV so I have an excuse not to exercise, and this week I have had the mother of all toothaches, but there is no excuse for eating badly & drinking in excess.

Last week I gained 500gms.  This week I gained.... wait for it... *drumroll*.... 3.9kgs.  Yep!  Overindulge much?

This last week before Christmas was hectic to say the least.  With not feeling well, and little time, unfortunately we fell into the trap of takeaway food for convenience.  I might add here also that our freezer is FULL of frozen 12wbt meals, so there really was no excuse!  In one week we managed to eat fish'n'chips, pizza on 2 nights, and KFC (my daughter's choice for her birthday).  Throw into that Christmas day at our place with the inlaws & a boxing day of drinking & eating leftovers, and I should be lucky 3.9kgs was the only damage!!!  I can only put it down to being tired & lazy in the build up to Christmas.  Still, no excuses!

So here I sit today, weighing 105.3kgs, and I am owning it.  I had a great Christmas period, and enjoyed my nights drinking with Greg.  But it's over now.  I don't want to slip back into those old habits.  I don't want to be that person anymore.  All the booze is gone.  The leftovers & crap food are in the bin or eaten.  Today is a fresh start.  I'm off the booze, and even plan on having a dry New Year's Eve.  And I am even looking forward to it!

Our beautiful Christmas tree, decorated by the kids; the new trainers Greg & I
 bought each other for Christmas (yep mine are the bright yellow ones!); Santa photo; our 4 little elves

 
In a week's time we go away to our caravan for 2 weeks, and I plan on coming home in double digits.  This is a HUGE ask.  Holidaying at our caravan is usually a time of beer drinking in the sun, and wine drinking with nibbles at night.  But not this year.  The caravan park has a new gym, beautiful new pools, and a walking/running track.  We'll be packing our boxing gloves & pads, and taking our bikes, so there is really no excuse for not exercising each day.  We CAN DO THIS!  Together as a team, Greg and I will smash this!!!

Aidan & I with Paige on her 10th Birthday, 2 days before Christmas.

So, the silly season is over & done with.  I'm still hit & miss with the days I feel well & the days I am bed ridden.  But there is no excuse for not eating clean, and exercising on those days I do feel good.  Let's do this!

I hope you all had a fantastic & safe Christmas, and enjoyed your time with friends & family!  Christmas definitely is just such a beautiful time of year - my favourite by far!

Now on to 2013!  Cannot wait!  Onwards & downwards....

My First Triathlon!!

I've just signed up for my very first triathlon.  Lord help me!

Now, I know that I may be slightly insane signing up for it seeing as I am currently suffering from the effects of Ross River Virus, but I really want to do this!  I've signed up for the short course, but hope I will be able to get the training in (and of course feel well enough) to do the medium course.  I'm not worried at all about the bike leg, or even the running leg (which I will walk/jog/shuffle, or as Greg calls it, joffle!), but I am worried about the swim leg.  I am not a strong swimmer, and to tell the truth I can't get the breathing thing correct without gulping down water whilst doing freestyle.  But I will give it my best shot anyway.  Oh, and there is another thing.  BATHERS!!!  My Lord, I really don't want to be seen in bathers!!!

It's week 3 or 4 of having RRV.  Or is it week 5?  I've lost count with all the horrible days blurring into each other.  I do know that I've only had 3 days of feeling well in the last 2 weeks.  Tuesday of last week, Sunday just gone, and today I am feeling pretty good as well.  I'm a bit worried because I seem to have a really, really bad day after a day of feeling well, and tomorrow I have a 7 hour shift at work, followed by our work Christmas party.  I am praying I will be okay for it, as I really want to go, and I've paid for Greg to come as well.  Fingers crossed!

So, battling on!  5 weeks until the Triathlon Pink!!!

Down In the Dumps

I must admit, I am just miserable.  I feel like crying constantly at the drop of a hat, and it's all because I can't stand what is going on with my body, and that I have no control over it!

The constant feeling of being tired, no matter how much rest & sleep I get is driving me insane.  And the days where I feel nausea all day long are just an added bonus.  Not to mention when my back, wrists, ankles, knees, jaw or any other body joint aches.  I seriously just don't know how I am going to keep going on like this if there is no improvement.  It horrifies me when I hear stories of people suffering from Ross River Virus for 9-12 months!  Are you kidding me?  My life is far too busy for that!!!!

It's been such a full on week with more to come in the next few days - Kinder concerts, ballet rehearsals & ballet concerts, School concert, school Mass, Kinder picnic, Work Christmas parties.  Not sure when I am supposed to get time to rest, work, exercise, meal prepare & do all the everyday household duties!!!!  Add into the mix that I don't have a car, and I just feel like curling into a ball under my doona, crying my heart out & yelling "Fuck it"!!!

So, it's weigh in Wednesday & I was pleasantly surprised with a 700gm loss.  I have drank far too much wine this week, and not watched what I've been eating (did someone say jam sandwich comfort eating?), and with not being able to exercise, I was definitely a little shocked when I stood on the scales this morning.  I just have to make sure I back up that loss with a good week, and really try my best.  I set some goals earlier in the week, and I must be honest and admit I have failed at all of them.  BUT I am back to trying them again as of now!  I need to harden the hell up & JFDI!!!

Some good news on my friend Meg's Mum.  They are just waiting on the biopsy results but she may not have cancer - it may be Barrett's Disease.  Fingers crossed for a good outcome.  So, so happy for my gorgeous friend & her family!

Why We Ride!

A dear friend has just informed me that her Mum has cancer.  Her heart is breaking right now.  I remember the day so clearly that my Dad told me he had cancer.  It was numbing.

THIS is why we ride.  THIS is why we want to raise $250,000 as a team this year for Peter Mac.  THIS is why I will shave my head.  THIS is why I will conquer that 200kms in October 2013.

Thinking of you, your Mum & your family Megs xxxx

Red Flag Fail

I've still been feeling terrible with the Ross River Virus, and was only able to do 5 minutes of our regular Saturday morning training session before I had to call it quits.  It is driving me insane having no control over this!  I hate feeling so drained & tired all the time!

Saturday night was my first "Red flag" event of the silly season.  It was a catch up with a group of my best friends for our Annual Kris Kringle dinner, and one of my friend's hosted it at her place.  I was struck down badly with exhaustion on Saturday, so was in doubt I would make it to the dinner at all.  I spent all day Saturday in bed to rest, and I was able to make it although I wasn't feeling the best.

I was so glad I went - being with friends is definitely food for the soul.  However, after hardly eating anything all day, I let my guard down with the pre dinner nibbles - dips, bikkies and cheeses.  We then had takeaway Thai for dinner, and although Thai Green Curry is my favourite dish of ALL TIME, I made the wise choice of beef & vegetable stir fry with chilli, and didn't opt in for any rice or roti bread.  Dessert was a small slice of pavlova.  I also had a champers & a bottle of wine, and there went my calories for the day!!!

Now, of course we are all allowed to let our hair down now & then, but I have to be mindful that I am not capable of exercising, so my calorie intake has to be PERFECT.  I know this, but still, I struggle with it.

Sunday I actually felt a bit better after my day of bed rest, and we had a catchup BBQ at our place with the Ride to Conquer Cancer team - some members we did the ride with in October, and some new members who will be joining us next year.  Was a lovely relaxing afternoon, but of course I ate way too much, and drank another bottle of wine. Shit!

So, back into it again today.  I have woken so tired that I feel I need to get back to bed.  I just can't live like this - one day feeling well, the next day exhausted.  It is just the most frustrating feeling ever!!!  I just want to feel NORMAL again!!

I've set myself a few goals for this week:

1. When not working late shifts, to be in bed by 9.30-10pm at the absolute latest to give myself lots of rest.  I've been going to bed late some nights, and that is not helpful with the exhaustion I am feeling.
2. To drink 4 bottles of my 750ml water bottle (ie. 3 litres).  I've been slackening off with the water the last week, so I need to build this habit back up again.
3. To track my calorie intake religiously so I know how I am faring.  I've been working it out in my head the last 3 weeks!
4. To do some core exercises this week & gentle walks EVERY single day.  Even though I am not feeling the best, 10 minutes of core is better than none!
5. To be organised & plan for the busy week we have ahead.  We have ballet performances, Kinder concert & school concert on this week, so a very, very busy week ahead. 

So, the beginning of Week 4 & I plan on achieving the goals I've set for myself.   If only I could keep my eyes open long enough......

Here's some pictures of some delicious 12wbt dinners we've had this week that the whole family have enjoyed.

Kangaroo Pie with Mushy Peas

Nasi Goreng with Tofu

Would You Shave Your Head??

Hubby came home today from work & asked me the question "Would you shave your head for $5000?".  I quickly answered that I would not.  A friend of ours, who is also a member of "Team Fighting Back" for our Ride to Conquer Cancer next year has decided she will shave her head if she raises $5000 for the ride.  She's a gorgeous girl, and definitely would still look stunning with a bald head.

I've had a shit of a day today with feeling unwell & dizzy.  I had a bit of an upset tummy this morning, and felt a bit faint on a couple of occasions, so all day I've been feeling very sad & sorry for myself.  I've been tidying up after dinner & washing the dishes, which gave me some quiet time to think to myself (funny how everyone disappears when it's time to clear up after dinner!).  Why wouldn't I shave my head?  I don't think of myself as vain in any way, but I do like that I have long hair.  I always wear it up every day, but when I go out (on those rare occasions!) I make a special effort to make sure my hair looks nice.  And I've been growing it for ages, so it would be devastating to cut it all off.

But what about those that don't have a choice.  Those undergoing chemo who lose their hair.  Small children, mothers, fathers, sons, daughters, friends, lovers, who go through the agony of their hair falling out.  I remember so clearly Jim Stynes in his documentary about his cancer battle "Every Heart Beats True", and when his hair started to fall out he shaved his head.  His son shaved his as well to be just like Dad.  Beautiful & touching.

I really don't want to shave my head.  But what if I could raise $10,000 for Peter Mac?  Peter Mac where my Dad is currently receiving chemo.  Would I do it then?  You better believe it!  So, now I've put it in writing, I have to go through with it.  If I raise $10,000 for the Ride to Conquer Cancer, benefiting Peter Mac, I will shave my head.  God help me!

If you'd like to get the ball rolling, you can donate here:- Julie's Ride to Conquer Cancer 2013

Ross River Virus BE GONE!!!!

Well, I sit here absolutely shattered.  Weigh in this morning saw a gain of 1.4kgs.  I'm weighing in at 101.6kg and have moved further away from those double digits.  I expected it, I knew it was coming, so why am I sitting here close to tears and so upset about it?

I think it's the realisation that I have no control over this Ross River Virus, and I just have to accept whatever my body is doing.  And that's the problem - I HAVE NO CONTROL!  Previously if I'd gained, I'd have a reason for it, and although I'd be pissed off at myself, I knew I deserved it.  I didn't deserve a gain this week. I know deep down that last week wasn't a genuine loss of 4.2kgs because I was sick, but it still pisses me off that I was so close to getting under 100kgs, and now here I am 1.7kgs away.  Again!

But, I have to remember it's not all about the number on the scales.  I am feeling smaller & lighter & fitter.  I have to listen to my body, and let it rest when it needs to, so that I can recover from the RRV quickly.  I will get to those double digits eventually.  This week is just another week in the grand scheme of the rest of my life.  Ho hum.  I will get there!

I'll Have a Side of Energy thanks!

Hubby's new workout singlet!!

Ah, how I look back on old posts and cringe at what I have written.  In my last post I said I would smash it with exercise these next 2 days, but all I've done is bloody sleep!
I have confirmation yesterday from the doctor that my blood tests show I have Ross River Virus for certain.  I am relieved that it is only RRV and not something more sinister, so now I can just work through getting better & resting my body up.  Yesterday I had absolutely no energy.  I went for a 2 hour walk with Aidan in the pram, and when I got home I was absolutely wiped out.  I had to have an afternoon nap, and then I was in bed by 7.30pm for an 11 hour sleep.  Today I feel just as tired, and I am OVER it!
And of course, the scales keep moving up.  I am not sure what is going on, but obviously my body is reacting to the illness, or maybe the lack of exercise. Apart from the couple of weekend indiscretions with the wine & snacks, there is nothing I've done to warrant a 2kg gain.  I'll just have to ride it out & hope for those double digits sometime before Christmas.  Fingers crossed!
So here we go, Week 3 and onwards & downwards....

Double Digits, Wherefore Art Thou?

Stocking fillers!

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas!  It's in the air - the excitement is brewing & the kids are bouncing off the walls!  The tree was put up, and the chocolate Advent calanders have been started.  I absolutely love Christmas, and nothing is better than sharing the joy with the kids.  It is unfortunate that I happened to marry the Grinch, who hates Christmas & all that goes with it!!  Bah Humbug to him!!!!

Nine of us trained on Saturday morning

I've been slowly improving with the Ross River Virus & feeling better each day.  I'm still tired ALL THE TIME though, so exercise was non existent for a good week.  Saturday I joined in with our regular garage session where we did a tabata circuit & boxing.  It was great to be back into it!  We had a few new people join us, the more the merrier for sure.  Sunday we went for a big walk.

My nutrition has been pretty good, although I did let myself down with a few wines over the weekend, and of course, the usual snacking that comes with drinking! ARGH!  Why, oh why!?!?!  The big problem I have since last Wednesday's weigh in, is that the scales seem to be going up!  Why are they moving in the wrong direction?!?!  Why does that double digit figure elude me!?!?!

I've got 2 days until weigh in & I need to smash it.  I'm going to up the exercise anti as much as I can & see if I could possibly perform some small miracle to make it to double digits.  Fingers crossed!

Where the Hell is Ross River Anyway??!?!?!

I should have known those last words of my last post would come back to haunt me.  "Things can't get any worse, can they?"

Um, yep, they sure can!

It seems I have Ross River Virus.  So, I've had a week of night sweats & fevers, with an ongoing headache for 6 days, a weekend of bed rest and then yesterday came the onset of sore muscle joints.  And I don't just mean sore, as in a bit achy, I mean sore, as I can hardly walk due to my sore knees & ankles and sore in that I just cannot move my extremely painful wrists!  Ouchies!

So back to the doctor this morning, and although they are waiting the "absolute" confirmation from blood test results, it seems the likely outcome is Ross River Fever.  My friend Mr Google assisted me in looking further into this, and yep, I am pretty much sure it's what I have.  There's nothing that can be done about it, I just have to let it run it's course, except for taking pain relief for the sore joints.  And it's not contagious to anyone else, and I contracted it from mozzie bites.  Whether here or in Bali, the doctor couldn't really say, but I doubt it'd be from Bali as that was too long ago.

Unfortunately, in some cases, people suffer with RRV symptoms for up to 6 months!  Holy shitballs, I will be pissed off if I feel lethargic & crap for another 6 months, but I will just take it one day at a time!

So, it's also weigh in Wednesday today, and I was stoked to be weighing in at 100.2kgs.  Actually, that's a lie.  I weighed in at 100.2kgs on Monday, so I was really hoping to be in double digits by today.  I'm a bit disappointed the scales hadn't moved in a couple of days, but I had a great loss of 4.2kgs this week, so I'm over the moon about that.  I know this week IS IT!   This week is the week where I will be a 90s girl.  And I must tell you, the thought of it makes my heart race.  It's a strange feeling to describe, but I just don't know myself as anything other than this hugely overweight person weighing triple figures.  I look into the mirror & I just can't fathom that I have lost 25.6kgs in the last 26 weeks.  So strange!  I am really missing my exercise though - I managed a bike ride last Wednesday, a walk Thursday & a walk Friday, but had to pull out of our garage session Saturday morning due to feeling sick, and haven't been able to exercise since.  And all I want to do is GET MOVING again.  I know this sickness is going to hinder my ability to smash it this round, and it's so disappointing.  Bum shit bugger crap!!

We did celebrate a birthday this week (although I celebrated it from bed).  Aidan turned 4!  Can't believe my baby is growing up so fast, and yep, it's making me feel old.  I did indulge in a little slice of cake with some icecream, but hey, it's my baby's birthday after all!

So, onwards & downwards, and I did find out that Ross River is in Queensland!!!

Shit Happens. Pour Me a Wine!

Well, what can I say other than it's been a shit couple of days!!!!  I had terrible hayfever on Wednesday, and ended up in bed by 5.45pm.  Then came on shivering & goosebumps, followed by fever & sweating throughout the night.  I woke Thursday morning with the sheets absolutely soaked!  Yesterday I felt better, although a little fuzzy in the head, and a dull headache lingered all day.  I can only put it down as to some sort of virus I've picked up.  And as an added

Greg then had a car accident in my car on the way home from work. He's thankfully not injured!  We thought the car was fine to drive, but on my way to work last night, the car overheated with smoke billowing from the engine.  I had to call into work to tell them I wasn't coming in, and the wait for a tow truck was well over 2 hours.  So now we are a one car family, which is going to make life extremely tough to say the least, especially when the only car we have is a 5 seater, so not even big enough to fit the 6 of us in!!!

In the past, I would have turned to wine & chocolate after a shithouse day like yesterday.  I did actually mention to Greg I could swig right from the neck of a wine bottle!!!  But with our new resolve to giving this round all we've got, that wasn't going to happen.  We got home very late & had a cup of tea.

A shit week ahead as we struggle with ballet concert rehearsals for my daughter, coupled with me working nights next week and one car!!!  We're going to have to pull the favours from my parents & their car to help us out.  Things can't get any worse, right?

1st Weigh In of Round 4

Weigh in this morning saw a loss of 2.3kgs.  I'm absolutely thrilled with it, although I am still 800gms up from the weekend away in Sydney.  I have no doubt that extra (+ more) will be gone next week.  I'm in "the zone" and just feeling so bloody great about this round!!

I managed to get out on a quick bike ride this morning on my borrowed bike "Mince".  He's going home to his owner this weekend, and I must admit I feel devastated about it.  We just can't afford for me to get a new bike at the moment (Christmas being the time of the year we struggle most financially), so I will just have to make do with my big clunky bike until we can :(

This Sunday I have my first "red flag" of this round & of the Silly Season.  I have a work dinner which just happens to be at a Greek restaurant.  I am going to make sure I drive to the dinner so I am not tempted by alcohol, and I am going to have to be so very careful of everything I put into my mouth - I absolutely love Greek food and unfortunately it is very easy to overeat when everything comes out on share platters.

So, a successful weigh in, and here's to an even bigger and better week!!!

Onwards & downwards.....

Nothing's Gonna Stop Me!!!!

Me at The Rocks in Sydney

Round 4 is here baby!!!!

I woke this morning so eager to get on with the day, but came crashing down with a 3.1kg gain from the weekend!!!  Holy begeezus!  All those fish and chips, beers & kebab just sitting in my gut!!!!

So, here I am starting this round at 106.7kgs.  And I really don't care, cause I am going to SMASH this round!!!  Eating will be perfect & clean, and exercise will  be regular & I will go hard!!!

Fortunately Greg was still on leave today, so I was able to get out on a bike ride.  The wind was strong, but I smashed it, and pushed myself harder than ever before.  I felt exhilarated, with that feeling in the pit of my stomach like something exciting was about to happen.  And then I realised, it is happening - my life is finally happening.  I am getting out there & living!  And I am loving it!

Today's effort on the 32km bike ride

I love being on the bike & the sense of freedom it gives me, and I love the way how I have time to reflect on absolutely everything.  It was out on the bike that I remembered the few people I met at the 12wbt finale party who mentioned they read my blog & were inspired by me.  How shocking, and humbling that was to hear.  But I had a think about it this afternoon on the bike, and I thought that I suppose others can see that if someone like me can start to make a change - 40 year old me with my ankle held together with screws & plates, busy with 4 young kids & working evenings & weekends - then I just may give them hope that they can change their life too!  And you can!!!  You just have to believe it!!!

Have just managed to cross 2 things off my bucket list - wall sit for 2 minutes (YAY I smashed it!!!), and climb the Harbour Bridge.  Life just keeps getting better & better!


So Round 4, Day 1 is now over.  And I am so excited about what the next 83 days will bring!  NOTHING'S GONNA STOP ME!!!

12wbt Round 3 Finale Weekend

Sharing a special moment with the love of my life.

Wow, what a blast we had in Sydney.  It all started off a bit nerve wracking with being late to the airport on Friday morning, so a quick dash across the car park at Avalon Airport with a couple of minutes spare to check in!!!  A rainy day in Sydney, but was a nice one with an unexpected lunch catchup with an old friend, and then the Sydney Harbour Bridge climb.  To say I was shitting myself about the climb is an understatement!   Greg & I had a conversation about the bridge climb approximately 4 years ago, and I remember saying to him how the climb was on my bucket list. I recall his words so clearly "You'll never be able to do it with your ankle".  I resigned myself to the fact it was something I would just never be able to do!  I am so glad I proved myself wrong!

Jen, Greg & I

The view at the top of the bridge is breathtaking, and the sense of achievement and exhilaration you feel is just amazing.  You do literally feel like you are "on top of the world".  So glad to have shared the experience with my wonderful husband, and my best friend Jenny, who conquered her fear of heights!

The 12wbt Vic Crew

Saturday morning was the 12wbt workout and it seemed the Gods shined down on us with the clouds parting just as the workout was to begin.  Unfortunately my friggin ankle was aching from the bridge climb and all the walking around Sydney the previous day, so the workout was less than enjoyable for me.  However, the most enjoyable part of the event for me was meeting all the 12wbters that I only know from the Facebook groups & forums.  It was brilliant to give lots of virtual friends a squeeze and put a face to a name.

Greg & the drag queen on the way to the party

I decided to lash out & have my hair & makeup professionally done for the finale party, and all I can say is - what a disappointment!!!  I thought I looked like a drag queen, and as for my hair, I could have done it sooo much better myself.  So disappointing, and I'm glad I'd had a few wines beforehand or I think I would have had a complete break down before the party.  Note to self - Do your own hair & makeup from now on!!!!!

Love ya Megs xxx

The party was held at Fox Studios, and we arrived to meet a "virtual" friend of mine Megan.  She's a part of a small group of girls who originally met through the Weight Watchers Forums many years ago, and we formed our own "secret" Facebook group.  We chat daily and I feel like these girls are some of my very best friends - they know things about me I wouldn't dare tell anyone else!!!  I've met most of the girls, but Megs was one I hadn't yet, so to be able to actually SEE her in the flesh and squeeze her, and spend the night talking & drinking with her was just amazing - more amazing than actually being at the Finale party!  You're one special lady Megs x

Dayna, Greg, myself & Bec

It was a great to see Mish & have a photo with her & also to see some of the inspiring weightloss girls & boys up on stage. We partied the night away & had a blast!!!
Unfortunately Sunday welcomed Greg & I with some sore heads, and after a lovely ferry ride to Manly, fish and chips on the beach was called for, as were some beers in the sun back in the Sydney CBD, and a kebab for dinner at the airport on the way home.  Did someone say the last hurrah before the beginning of Round 4!?!?

The beautiful Kate (aka Coco Girl)

Round 3 Last Weigh In

Today is our last weigh in for the 12wbt round 3, and I weighed in at 103.6kgs.  A gain over the last 2 weeks (due to not weighing last week because of broken scales!) of 1.4kgs.  I am ashamed to admit that I actually had the thought pass through my mind to fudge my figures - to just put down the same weight as last week, as I didn't want to admit that I had gained.  But what would that prove?  That I can deceive everyone??  But I can't deceive the scales!! And ultimately,  I would know that it was lie, and I would have to live with the guilt!!!

So, here I am owning my gain.  I've lost 4.5kgs this round.  Yep, nearly slipped an "only" in there, but it's not "only" 4.5kgs.  It's a whole lot more than the weight, as I posted yesterday.  And it's 4.5kgs that is NEVER coming back.

Here we go onto a new chapter.  A weekend in Sydney to cap this round off, and then I am going to hit the ground running.  I will be in double digits by Christmas & at the end of Round 4 I will be 15+ kilos lighter!!!  BRING IT ON!!!!

The End of 12wbt Round 3

So, it's now the last week of the 12wbt Round 3.  I can't stop feeling that I've wasted this round, but I really have to try & remember how far I've come.  With all the events we've had on during the last 12 weeks, I need to appreciate my hard work & realise I could have gained many, many kilos (which is what I would have done in the past), but instead I kept battling on & lost over 5kgs, and 32.5cms from all over my body.  It's not a huge amount in comparison to the 17.7kgs I lost in the first round, but it still goes to the overall total.  And it's not just about the numbers - it's about the education I am getting that is setting me (and my family) up for a lifetime of activity & good health.

We took our final "after" photos in our underwear today.  I was disappointed to not really see a difference this round, but my photo today is a huge change to my starting photo in June.  I'm not yet brave enough to post those photos on this blog or share them on the 12wbt site with others. I look forward to the day when I can see myself in undies & bra & not be ashamed of what I see.  On that day, I will post ALL my before & after photos, as I will be proud of how far I've come.  I admire those that are able to post all their photos on the 12wbt forums - good on them!!!  I'll get there one day, as I plan on NEVER returning to that woman I was back in June this year.

Most of us in the family have been hit by a throat infection these last few days.  The little two have been lucky to escape it (so far), but it's knocked both Greg & I for a six.  I've decided I am going to take it easy on this last week of 12wbt.  I'm not going to be strict with my calories or my exercise, and I'm going to use it as a restful prelude to smashing out the next round, which starts on Monday.  I'm going to go hard, and really push myself out of my comfort zone.  I've been taking a few days in reading preseason tasks, and setting goals (as per my last post) & re-examining my commitments.  There are going to be NO EXCUSES in the next round.  Christmas & New Year, as well as a 3 week holiday are not going to derail me.  Nothing is going to stop me.

This Friday sees us flying out again to attend the 12wbt finale, which is this time in Sydney.  Friday we are doing the Sydney Harbour Bridge Climb.  It's something I've looked at in the past & thought I would never be able to do because of my ankle.  But with my improved fitness, I'm going to conquer it.    I'm extremely nervous about the fact we will be so high up, and apparently it's a bit nerve wracking being able to see the cars driving underneath you, but I will conquer my fears & I cannot wait to get to the top.  I'm actually really looking forward to it.

Saturday morning we have the 12wbt workout, and it will be great to hopefully meet up with others we met for the first time in Perth, and then some others we've only "met" online in Facebook support groups or in the 12wbt forums.  It'll be great to put a name to a face.  It's also a fancy dress workout, so it should be a hilarious day.

Saturday night is the big 12wbt finale party.  I'm having second thoughts about a dress I have on lay-by to wear, so I'm a bit panicked that I may have to go shopping again within the next day or so to find something more suitable.  I also need to do all the girly things like waxing, dying hair, pedicure and manicure.  It will also be less stressful at the party because Greg won't be on stage like the last round.

So a huge weekend ahead before the start of Round 4.  Exciting times ahead, and I can't wait to smash it out of the ballpark!

By The Way.....

My "Open Letter to Motorists" was published in the Sunday Herald Sun here in Melbourne!!!  They edited it a bit, so it didn't quite have the punch I wanted, but still..... I'm famous! haha!

Old Bad Habits BE GONE!!!

Indeed!!!!!

This week has just spiralled out of control.  Too much drinking, too much eating crap & not enough exercising & JFDI!!! And I know I would have had a gain this morning, but how fortunate for me that my scales aren't working!?!  I'm marking today as a "STS" (Stay the Same).

Team Fighting Back last weekend

Quite ironic that last Friday's post was about pulling my finger out & get back on track. I did nothing about getting back on track and instead I drank wine every day, and fell into the old habit of snacking whilst drinking late at night.  I did hardly any exercise, except for a couple of bike rides and a half arsed effort at circuit & boxing.  I just have not given a shit.   And then yesterday we hosted a BBQ for Melbourne Cup day, and I drank & ate to excess yet again.  Last night I couldn't sleep & tossed & turned whilst thinking about my goals for the next round, and then woke up feeling disgusted in myself, but ready to get back in control.  I'm ready.  It's time.

Carrot & muesli muffins - Yum!

So, as part of the preseason tasks for the next round, I have been thinking about my goals.  This round was an extremely tough one with all the red flags days - Perth trip, 40th birthdays, trip to Bali, Ride to Conquer Cancer, etc.  The next one will be challenging as well since it is over the silly season, but I am going to give it my all.

So, some of my goals for the next 12wbt & how I'm going to achieve them are:

• Limit alcohol intake to special occasions only - this would include Christmas Day, NYE, and the BIG challenge will be when on holidays at our caravan for 3 weeks.
• Exercise a minimum of 6 days per week, which should be easy whilst we are away as there is a new gym at our caravan park that has opened, and we will be taking our bikes away with us for lots of family rides!
• Strict clean eating.  Apparently the 12wbt will have lots of BBQ & family friendly recipes in the next round, which will help us when we are away.  We are having Christmas Day at our house this year so we can control the way in which food is cooked.
• Lose 15-20kgs.  If I go hard, and stick to the program, I can easily do this.
• Improve my fitness & strength.  With regular exercising I will easily be able to improve in these areas.
• Continue to support Greg in his journey.  He in turn will support me as we strive for a better future together with our kids.
• No excuses - JFDI!!!

I'm ready.  I know the round doesn't start for another week & half, but I am going to use this time as my "preseason" and get organised, and make sure my mind set is in the right place.

 

Bring on Round 4!!!

We never get sick of the 12wbt Banana bread in this house!

Time to Pull My Finger Out

Only 2 weeks to go on this round of 12wbt.  Can't believe it!  And although I do feel a teeny bit disappointed that I've wasted this round, I do think that with all our social activities, I should be thankful I haven't gained weight, which is what the old Julie would have done!!!

This week's weigh in saw a loss of 1kg, which I am stoked about as I was worried after being 3kgs up after the ride, but obviously it was just fluid retention.  So close to those double digits YET AGAIN!  That's going to be my aim for the next 2 weeks - to get under 100kgs.  I can do it.  I will do it!!!

Wednesday morning ride along the beach

Wednesday mornings are the only time of the week where I have 3 hours to myself with all the kids at school & kinder, and I have always gone out on the bike.  So this last Wednesday was no different, and I was pleased to ride 27kms with great ease (okay, the bum was a little tender) in such hot and windy conditions that we had.  The ride gave me a lot of time to reflect on the big weekend we've just had, and also the next 12 months in the lead up to the next ride.  I am so excited about what the future holds for Greg & I and the kids.  Our lives just keep getting bigger & better.

Bike riding is a great & easy calorie burner!

Yesterday Greg turned the big 4.0. and we celebrated with a bottle of Veuve Cliquot, followed by a few too many wines, chocolate cake & apple crumble.  I feel so sick today, and it is a good reminder of what I don't want to slip back into!

Accelerator Day brekkie - yum!

So, here I am committing to going hard over the next 2 weeks and making it into double digits!  As for the next round starting November 19th, I am going to give it my absolute all.  I am going to push myself more than I ever have before, and I am going to conquer the Silly Season over the Christmas/New Year period!!!!

Yes, I Can!! RTCC 2013

I was overwhelmed with the messages I received about my blog post on the ride yesterday.  I spent a lot of yesterday in tears again, as the enormity of the weekend hit.  I also received a Facebook message from an old high school friend who I haven't spoken to in years, who thanked me for the ride & mentioned her father had passed 3 months earlier.  He had melanoma - just like my Dad!!!  I received a round of applause from my work mates when I walked into work last night, and again I was nearly a blubbering mess!

So, yesterday I made the decision I will do the Ride to Conquer Cancer in 2013 as a RIDER!!!  I feel I have unfinished business.   As our team captain Bec says, I will make hills "my bitch".  I have a year to train on hills, to lose more weight with the 12wbt, to gain more fitness, and I will smash the RTCC in 2013.  BRING IT ON!!!!!

An Open Letter to the Motorists of Melbourne

My name is Julie.  On the weekend I participated in the 200km Ride to Conquer Cancer from Albert Park Lake to Healesville, and back again.  I am not a cyclist.  

Many of the roads we took to Healesville did not have bike lanes, and the shoulders on the roads were not suitable for riding on.  Some of the roads did not even have shoulders!  I am sorry that we were riding on your road, and that it may have taken you 5 minutes longer to get where you were going because you had to wait to overtake a cyclist.  But you know that cyclist that you revved your engine at – you see that yellow flag on the bike of their bike?  That flag represented a cancer survivor, or a cancer battler, and they are doing the ride to raise fund for Peter Mac who are doing valuable research into battling this disease.

To the driver that yelled abuse at me,  I am a 40 year old mother of four, who is out of breath from getting up that last hill, crying tears of pain, and I am sorry I am so slow that you have had to wait 20 seconds to get past me.  I am not riding to annoy you.  I am riding because my father is battling cancer and receiving treatment at Peter Mac, and for all the other people I know who are battling this horrible disease and whose families have been touched by cancer.

And to the P plater who raced up behind a group of cyclists, and nearly rear ended them before slamming on your brakes, one day you may be thanking us for the $6.2 million dollars we raised for Peter Mac.  Hopefully your life will be cancer free, but unfortunately it is inevitable that someone you know will be touched by cancer.

To the driver of the V8 ute who honked their horn so loudly at a slow riding elderly lady that she nearly fell off her bike, she is riding 200kms for this cause, when she should could be sitting comfortably at home with her children, grandchildren and probably her great grandchildren.  She is not intentionally holding you up the minute or so it takes to get past you. I'd like to see you ride 200kms!!!

 The route was well signed with warnings of lots of cyclists, and still you could not control your impatience.

I want to thank you, the many impatient motorists I witnessed from Melbourne to Healesville and back again.  You made me ashamed of the thoughts I've had in the past about cyclists.  

Next time, perhaps think about the cyclist as a person.  It's just someone like you, your Mum, Dad, your sister, brother, friend.  They are a road user too.  And when you see signs up that there is a cycling event on, take another route, or perhaps find some patience.

WOW! What a Ride!!!

Greg and I at the starting line

I sit here, coffee in hand, with every muscle in my body aching.  My eyes swollen from exhaustion, and all I can think is, thank God it's over!!!  WOW What a weekend!

I didn't complete the Ride to Conqeur Cancer, but I gave it all I could.  I did 140-150kms, and it took every bit of energy, every bit of mental strength I had.  I am disappointed I can't say I completed it, but I am also proud of myself for how I gave it my all.  It was the hardest thing I've ever done in my entire life!

Saturday morning 1800 riders gathered at Albert Park Lake. It was chilly & the rain started to drizzle on us.  I had to keep stamping my feet to get blood flowing through them, as I was chilled to the bone.  We were all so excited to be starting off on this ride we had been preparing for.  We gathered as a team - Me, Greg, Jen, Bec, Nicola, Nicki, and 2 others who weren't in our team, but were friends of Bec's, Corrina, and Tracey.  Having only just met Nicola, Nicki, Corrina & Tracey that morning (all friends of Bec's), let me just say I was honoured to meet four such lovely & gorgeous women!!

We started off, ever so slowly with the traffic, and the traffic lights making for slow going through the Melbourne CBD.  My borrowed bike "Mince" with the spokey dokeys on it were well received by the other riders, and I received comments about them all weekend.  Many remarked it took them back to their childhood, but everyone smiled or laughed about them, and I was so glad I was able to give that to riders throughout the weekend. Then on we went to the bike path along the Yarra River, and we were able to pick up a bit more speed.  Here I saw the first accident with the slippery conditions the drizzle was causing on the path.  The faster riders took off, and I caught up with the others in my team at the first Pit Stop at 27kms in Ivanhoe.

Team "Fighting Back" ready to ride

Off we went again for the next 25kms.  A few small hills, and I met up with the bunch at the next Pit Stop at 48kms.  Half way!!!  Holy shit, this was easy!!  I'd made it half way & it was only 11am!!!

Oh how wrong I was.  Now, I was aware that apparently there was a monster hill after this Pit Stop, but nothing had prepared me for what was to come.  The whole second half of the ride was hill after hill after hill.  It was a killer.  And I was shocked to see that even fit young male cyclists were walking up the hills as well.  That afternoon, I renamed it "The WALK to Conquer Cancer".  I would walk up a hill, get on the bike to ride down the other side, push myself as much as I could up the next hill, get off & walk it, and so on.  Hill after hill after hill.  It was crushing, but reassuring to see so many other riders doing the same thing.  I was exhausted.

Jen & I all smiles, about to head off

At 75kms I was spent.  It was lunch break & I had the mental struggle with how I could go on.  It was also the furtherest I had ever ridden (since my younger, fitter days of bike riding).  The mental struggle I had was the fact that I knew I could ride 100kms, but I knew I couldn't do it with all the hills.  Give me a flat road & I would have killed it, but these hills were brutal.  It was also deflating that at the lunch stop, there were hardly any riders.  I knew I was at the back of the pack, and for some reason it just deflated me.  I shouldn't have been comparing myself to everyone else, but it just took the wind out of my sails to know that the majority of the riders had probably already finished, my team mates included.  And here I was with 25kms of hills still to go.

I ate my lunch as quickly as I dared.  My thighs had started to cramp and I stretched as much as I could to relieve the pain.  I got back on the bike & struggled on.  There were "sweep" vehicles who regularly went by to see if you needed assistance & a lift to the next stop, but I just gave them the thumbs up (the signal to tell them I was fine) and pushed on.  It wasn't much later when my vision started to blur & I actually thought I saw a car reversing towards me (it was actually stationary!!!) that I thought I might be pushing it too far.  I reluctantly got off the bike & caught the next Sweep vehicle to camp.  I had completed 80-85kms.  Bitterly disappointed I didn't do the 100kms, but I had pushed myself to my limit.

Day 1 - Check out the gradients of those hills!!!

Dropped at camp in beautiful Healesville, and  I met up with Greg & the rest of the team, who had been there for hours already.  I was pissed off at myself, pissed off at them, pissed off at the world.  It had been a lonely day riding on my own, and I would be lying if I said I was disappointed I didn't have anyone to ride along with.  It would have made the whole experience a lot more enjoyable.  I watched as other teams waited at the top of hills for their team mates, or at pit stops, and I was envious I didn't have that support.  I think I could have completed the 100kms if I had some support around me.  I was pissed off at myself for being pissed off at them, because we had all agreed beforehand that we would ride at our own pace, but I think I could have pushed harder if I had someone with me.  I was so furious with myself for letting these feelings take over what should have been a relaxing night.

See my tent?  It's the blue one!

The Ride to Conquer Cancer was so well organised.  The tent city that had been set up for us to sleep in, was all set up by volunteers.  The volunteers in their wigs & crazy hats along the roadside cheering us on & giving directions were amazing & uplifting.  The drivers of the Sweep vehicles were so happy & accommodating, and I cannot put into words the thanks we all have for these volunteers!  The catering was brilliant.  We were given as many snacks as we could handle at the pitstops, and the lunch pack of a wrap, vegetable salad, drink, friand, and fruit was delicious & enormous.  Dinner was amazing, and the coffees & beers at the camp were fantastic & well appreciated.  The bike mechanics were awesome, and fixed Greg's buckled wheel, and jammed gears, as well as my gears that were playing up!!!  The whole atmosphere at camp was just so brilliant, and I enjoyed every moment of it.

Although in bed early, it was hard to sleep with the tents being so close to each other. We were able to hear every whisper, snore or fart throughout the evening & night.  Add to that sleeping on hard ground on a thin mat in a sleeping bag with aching bodies, and it was a tough night.  Then some fool and their alarm blaring at 5am brought the camp to life.  A brekkie of bacon, eggs, hash browns, baked beans, toast & coffee, and off we went for Day 2.

All the bikes tucked up for the night.

I felt confident for second day.  The balls of my feet were very sore & tender from all the unexpected walking I did the day before, but I taped them up, so they could handle more walking up hills.  I wore 2 pairs of bike knicks for the extra padding on my tender bum, and off I went before the rest of the team, knowing they would pass me shortly anyway.  I felt good.  My legs were raring to go.  Today I was going to go the whole way, regardless of how long it took me.

Then I hit the first hill about 5kms from camp.  The pain that shot through my bad ankle nearly took my breath away.   I just didn't understand it.  My ankle had given me NO pain the day before, and here I was just starting off today & I couldn't push down on the pedal at all.  Greg had caught up to me at this time & rode with me a while.  I stopped by a medic vehicle to see if they could strap my ankle for extra support, and was surprised when they told me they "don't do strapping".  WTF?!?!  I pushed on, but not much further I had to stop.  And then it started.  The tears.  The uncontrollable sobbing.  I was going to do this 100kms today, and here I was 5-10kms into it and unable to go on because of that damn ankle!  It broke me.  And I must say, I could not believe the compassion of the riders that passed me by, sobbing on the road.  Nearly each & every one of them asked if I was okay.  It was so uplifting to me to see how generous the human spirit can be.  Dozens of gorgeous people who will never know how much there comments of "Are you okay?" meant to me.  I was picked up by a Sweep vehicle and taken to the first Pit Stop, where I visited the Medic tent, to be told again that they "don't do strapping".  How is it, on a bike ride where riders get sore knees, ankles, etc that the medics are not able to strap up knees and ankles?  It's beyond me.  I had met up with my team again, and Greg tried to convince me to get in a sweep vehicle again & be taken to the next stop, but I wanted to push on & see how I went.  I took some anti inflammatory tablets, and set off again on the bike.

One of the smaller hills

The ankle felt good, and I pushed on.  A few more hills, and it gave out on me.  I was done.  I was defeated.  And on again came the tears.  Every part of me felt so good, except that bloody ankle.  Once again I was picked up in a Sweep vehicle, but they took me BACK to the last pit stop, instead of forward to the next one, something I found out later they should not have done.  I wanted to go forward, to be ahead of my team mates, so I could hopefully get back on the bike & get a little further ahead so we could meet up later on & ride the finish line together.  But this mistake of the Sweep vehicle absolutely devastated me.  I had to wait over an hour & a half at the wrong pit stop, after all the riders had left and the volunteers packed up.  I could not stop the tears, and the poor Crew leader could not console me, although she tried her hardest.  She organised a sweep vehicle to directly pick me up & take me to the next Pit Stop at Warranwood - the half way mark.

It was on that journey between pit stops that I decided to give the last 50kms of the ride all I had left.  I didn't care if I couldn't walk on my ankle for the next week or so, I was going to do it.  The worst of the hills were behind me, they had beaten me, but I would not let the rest of the ride get the better of me.  Even if I was the last rider through, I would do it.  So, at the next rest stop, I had a toilet break, and got straight back on that bike.  I was going to finish this!!!

There were many times on this 25kms stretch that I had to walk my bike up a hill.  There were also many times that tears got the better of me.  I was so angry by the mistake of the sweep vehicle taking me backwards, and costing me a couple of hours, when I could have been ahead of my team mates so they would have caught up to me and we could cross the finish line together.  I was also elated when I saw people cheering on the street, and it again brought me to tears that people thought we were doing a fantastic thing, which we really were.  There were also tears of frustration that my body had given up on me earlier in the day.  Why had my ankle let me down?  I know I was putting it through enormous pressure, especially with the walking up steep hills, but I just thought it would have held up better.  So many emotions running through me, which I definitely wasn't expecting.

I arrived at the Lunch Stop at 75kms, and was overjoyed I had at least completed one full leg of the day's ride.  I knew that if I couldn't complete the rest of the day, at least I could be proud of the fact I did one whole section.  I gave myself only 15mins to have a quick bite to eat, and a toilet break.  One of my team members had just left lunch as I was getting there, so I wanted to be as quick as possible, so back on the bike for me!

Day 2

It was whilst leaving this lunch spot, and straight into a hill, that a lady on the footpath yelled out to us "Thank You all for doing this.  My husband is battling cancer & having chemo at Peter Mac.  Thank You".  I commented to the woman riding beside me that it made this all worthwhile.  It puts it all into perspective.  Here I was battling with my emotions,  struggling with the shooting pain through my ankle, and her one little comment made it all worthwhile.  I was doing this ride for my Dad, for one of my dear friend's husband, Tom, who is going through his own cancer battle, and for everyone else that is battling, or who had lost the battle.  For all those families & friends who had been touched by cancer, for those who would be touched by cancer in the future.  And for all those people who believed in me and supported me, all those who made donations to help me raise nearly $4000 for this ride.  For all those who contributed to making this the biggest fundraiser in Australia's history - raising a staggering $6.2 million for Peter Mac.

Greg and I had been texting each other throughout the 2 days, just so I could see how far ahead he was of me, but mostly so I knew he was safe, and vice versa.  There were many accidents on the ride, with cyclists being hit by cars or other riders, and one serious accident of a rider going too fast downhill, hitting a pothole, and landing on his head.  Some of the roads on the route were especially dangerous, with no bike lanes, and no shoulder on the road to ride on.  We were literally riding on the narrow roads, sharing the narrow lane with cars and some motorists just had no patience, and it was extremely dangerous at times.  As a driver, I know how frustrating cyclists can be when riding 3 or 4 abreast on the road, but these drivers had to realise that many of us were just average Joes out to make a difference for cancer.  We are not cyclists who intentionally wanted to piss off motorists.  We were mothers, grandmothers, Dads, uncles, friends, cousins, brothers, sisters,  who were just trying to do some good & raise some money.  It made me so angry that many motorists (most especially ignorant P Platers) would intentionally drive so close to cyclists, beep their horns, rev their engines or even hang out the windows yelling abuse at us.

Riding in to the very last pit stop

So not long after leaving the lunch break I received a text from Greg stating he was at the last Pit stop of the day.  He only had 12kms to go, and he asked if I wanted him to wait for me.  I really wanted to ride the last section with him so we could ride over the finish together, but I felt guilty that he would have to wait for so long for me.  I knew there were many hills ahead of me, and I would have to walk some, so this was the one section of the ride where I pushed myself to the limits.  I cried my heart out because I was exhausted and feeling guilty at Greg having to wait, but I gave it my all.  I rode up hills that I would have previously walked up, but I pushed on & on & on.  And then I was at the last pitstop & there was Greg waiting for me.  It was nearly over.

I quickly sculled a bottle of orange juice, had a toilet break & off we headed together for the last 12kms of the ride.  This was the easy section along the bike path of the Yarra River, and into the Melbourne CBD to the finish at Albert Park Lake.  Why was it then, that every single part of my body screamed that it couldn't go on?  My fingers & wrists started cramping, my toes were numb, my "seat" was burning and chaffing.  My ankle screamed at me to stop.  I equated this to the feeling you get when you get home from a long drive and all of a sudden you have that unbearable urge to go to the toilet.  I knew that we were so close, and my body was telling me enough.  Once again the tears came, and as I struggled to ride along behind Greg, I battled with my mind to overcome this.  Where was my second wind?  The extra energy that you usually get when you get to the finish?  Fortunately I found it with about 1km to go, and over the finish line we went.  What an amazing achievement!

Finished!!!!

Three members of my team finished the whole 200kms, and the other three of us did the most we could. What a brilliant achievement by each & every one of us.  Our team raised $27,000 for Peter Mac!!!  We were welcomed at the finish by most of our team, and refreshed with a cold beer, a hamburger & a well needed massage!  An icepack for my swollen ankle & the joy on the faces of all the riders and supporters was hard to ignore.  We had done it!  What a weekend!!!!

Team Fighting Back with Tracey & Corrina - We did it!!!

I am so proud of everyone - Greg, who would never have dreamed of riding 200kms up & down hills 6 months ago, and who has lost over 30kgs to make this dream a reality.  Jen, who made sure she never walked up ANY of those hills.  Nicola, who is undergoing her own battle against cancer, and rode the 100kms like a machine on the first day.  She became ill and had to leave camp, but she is so inspiring & amazing!!!  Nicki, who under advice from her physio, was unable to do the whole ride, but did the best she could.  And Bec, our team captain, who convinced the rest of us to sign up for the ride.  Bec is the loveliest, most kind hearted soul you'll ever meet, and it was an honour & joy to be a part of this ride with her.

We conquered the Ride to Conquer Cancer.  And yes, I've signed up for next year!!!  AS A VOLUNTEER!!!