The Penny Has Dropped..... Again....

Yes, well, re-reading back on my last post, I started with good intentions, but it did actually take a couple of days for the penny to actually drop.  I caught a sight of myself down at the shopping centre the other morning, a reflection in a shop window, the back of my shirt hitched up over my big arse, and I think it gave me the jolt I needed.  It reminded me of the way I felt when I had lost over 30kgs and was so close to 100kgs in March last year.....

• I liked to catch my reflection every now & then, as it would give me a shock to see how much weight I had lost, and how far I had come.
• I liked to dress nicely & buy new clothes, and took more time with my appearance, something I don't bother with when I am bigger.
• I liked my husband to show me affection & intimacy, but now I feel embarrassed & disgusted at the weight I have gained.
• I was spurred on by all the comments of friends and acquaintances about how great I looked, & how fantastic I was doing.  I remember EVERY single comment people gave me, and I want that feeling back again.
• I loved the conversations I had with the kids about health & fitness, and how my son (who was 10 at the time) gave me a magnet that he had made on Mothers' Day, with words to describe me.  One of them was the word "FIT".  I want my kids to think of me as fit & healthy, and I want to be a role model for them, especially my daughter.

I don't want to feel embarrassed anymore.  Embarrassed because I am so fat, and embarrassed in front of all those people who saw me lose the weight, and have now seen me gain it again.

23 weeks til we go to Bali.  I am taking things one day at a time, but I must admit, I would LOVE to drop 20kgs in that time.  It's realistic.  I can do it, but will focus on just getting through today, and then getting through tomorrow...

I've been gathering inspiring slogans whenever I see them.  Good visual reminders!!!